Monday, May 25, 2009

Desultory Mentations

I'm spending a weekday at home after long. I mean a weekday where everyone else is working, and I'm not. Ofcourse there have been public holidays. I have a leave today since exams begin tomorrow. I really want to write - I know not what shall I write though.

The light is coming back to life. Have been spending more time with friends, being more open hearted now. I haven't been analysing everything that everyone says in too deep now. It's too stressful to do that. So have been taking things and people on their face value. Keeps you fresh and going.

I'm supposed to be neck deep in studying right now - but just can't concentrate. Heck.. okay, I'll probably do random things I feel like doing and then try to tie myself down with business management later.

The television is switched on and playing a popular bollywood song. I cannot hear it, since it's muted. But this song is familiar and that is why I recognize it. I wonder why, but I tend to do this often - leave the television and on mute - with random non sensical imagery on its screen. I don't want to unmute it, since I find it not too pleasing to hear.. need some calm. But I refuse to turn it off too. Whilst I am deeply engrossed in looking at the computer screen, reading, on phone, or just lying there. Why do I do this? I don't know. I wonder what sort of comfort it gives me to have multiple rays of light create images of people in colorful outfits jump and scream their guts out - screams I cannot hear... or choose not to.

I'll write later... I'm not thinking clearly right now.

Love,
Devil's Own